As a child, we grow up learning that we can do anything, go anywhere, be anyone. We don't have limitations because we're children with high hopes and high dreams that we can achieve anything. The problem with this mentality is that when we reach for things and learn they are outside of our natural abilities, the veil is torn and we are no longer able to do anything, go anywhere, or be anyone. We find out where we're inadequate (and then we learn what that word means).
So, here I am in all my inadequacies....
What have I been doing the past month, one might ask...? Good question. Here's my best answer. SOME THINGS. Not SOMETHING, but some THINGS. Have I moved forward in this project? YES. Have I written a song? YES. But, it's a constant stream of inadequate feelings that stops me from posting to my blog, or even sitting down at the piano. You know, I've heard that in order to write a song you have to have a melody line, notes that flatter each word. I don't have that.
What's my fear? My fear is the very thing I love most in this world, (next to my husband and my son)...THE MUSIC. What if I write a melody line that sounds like everyone else's? What if I can't come up with anything? What if I simply forget the small taste of what I know of the keyboard?
My question for you all to ponder, and I am there with you in this: Why do we fail to look at what we CAN do (like when we were kids), and instead focus on the veil that was torn a long time ago, when failure creeped in and the realization sunk in that maybe we CAN'T simply just DO?
I'll leave you with my recent thought, and I promise that the next time the pen hits the page of this blog it will be words with notes flickering on around them :-)
RECENT THOUGHT: We do have the "world," so to speak, at our fingertips. The thing we miss is that in the midst of being taught that we can do anything, go anywhere, be anyone, we miss out on the WORK that has to go into it. I wish I would've stayed in piano lessons when I was in first grade. That would make this project easier. I wish I would've invested more time in voice lessons. That would make this project easier. What I have come to learn, (a lesson I should've learned a long time ago), is that it takes discipline and focus to reach those dreams you are confident in as a child.
If I don't discipline myself, I don't achieve. If I don't achieve, I regret. If I regret, them I don't influence.
I'll leave you with this: I think it was Wayne Gretzky who coined the phrase, "You miss 100% of the shots you don't take." If you don't take 'em, you don't make 'em.
Here's to maximizing on the gifts and opportunities that God has given me.
God, I want to honor you with my voice and my words. Always.
Peace,
Emily <><
PS....Have I thanked you yet for reading this blog? Thank you.
